Throwback: Toys From the 90's I Always Wanted As A Kid But Never Got

We all remember the toys from our past that we never had. The ones that we watched the commercials for, begged our parents for, dreamed of at night, drooled in envy as we watched our friends play with them or leave them neglected in their rooms (how ungrateful!), knowing full well that if YOU had that toy, no way would you ever put that toy down (or so you told your parents). Of course you loved the toys that you had, but there was just something about those elusive toys that you never received, not for your birthday, Christmas, or any other holiday or event, no matter how much you begged.

And now, as an adult you could technically buy them yourself on eBay, but the thought of actually buying a much wanted childhood toy from some random person who actually kept it in its packaging as if they knew even back then that some strange millennial who missed out on this certain, random toy craze would one day be willing to pay an exorbitant amount of money for it, just kind of creeps you out a little. Oh, hell. If I had the money, I would for sure buy at least two things on this list. Let’s be totally honest.

Despite having a wonderful childhood filled with late 90’s and early 2000’s toys (I was not left wanting. I had Barbies, Littlest Pet Shop sets, Polly Pockets, tons of stuffed animals, etc.), I still think about these toys that got away and the fun I most definitely would have had with them. Here are the toys that would have obviously changed my life for the better if I had had them*

*Totally not true, but definitely what I thought as a child.

Doodle Bear

Oh, Doodle Bear, how I dreamt of you as I watched the commercials of happy children drawing on you with those special markers you came with, then popping you in the washing machine for you to come out all nice and clean and blank, ready to be drawn all over again. One of my best friends growing up had this bear and I was completely envious. Looking back, what was so special about this toy? That it was a stuffed animal that you were literally allowed to draw on, unlike the walls of the house? That it was washable, so your obviously ugly looking doodles could be wiped away in the wash, ready to be transformed into a brand new piece of artwork? Obviously the bear was cute, but your artwork was not, so what was kind of the point? I still wanted it though. So, so badly.

Easy Bake Oven

Who didn’t have an Easy Bake Oven growing up? Me. The answer is ME. The entire idea of a miniature oven (literally powered by a lightbulb. That was how it baked food. By a hot lightbulb. We were truly lied to as children), that could bake cakes, cookies, and more? Delightful! Real ovens are super hot and scary, but Easy Bake Ovens were cute, came with that weird thing to hold the tiny pan and push it in and out of the oven, AND it came with packets of (just add water!) mix to make all sorts of delicious (aka disgusting) baked goods. Now, I received an old, handed down Easy Bake Oven (I was the youngest of my sisters, so I received a LOT of hand me downs of all sorts), which did not include the pans, so I had to power through and try to fashion my own out of aluminium foil. It did not go well. At all. I burnt my brownies (or what it supposed to be a cake? Either way it came out dark brown) and knew if I had only had a brand new Easy Bake Oven with all of the proper accessories, this wouldn’t have happened. It obviously was my fault, not the Easy Bake Oven’s. A new Easy Bake Oven could do no wrong.

An American Girl Doll

These were the status symbol of every single girl in the United States in the 90’s. If you didn’t have an American Girl doll, who even were you? You definitely weren’t like Felicity, the spunky Colonial girl who fought for America’s freedom in the 1700’s. And you definitely weren’t Victorian rich girl Samantha, because if she had lived in the 90’s, she could have afforded to buy all of the American girl dolls, plus their accessories, plus the matching historical outfits that you could buy for yourself so you could match your doll. Having any sort of American Girl items would automatically put you in the cool girls club, along with shopping at Limited Too and owning platform sandals. I myself only ever received a miniature American Girl doll of Kirsten, the Swedish immigrant from the 1800’s, because my parents could barely afford that (American Girl dolls were and are, still crazy expensive, guys.) But I’ve known a few adults who have gone to an American Girl store and lived out their childhood dream and bought their very own American Girl doll to make up for the fact that they didn’t have one as a child. I mean, I’m not saying I would ever do that, but if I did….I would totally get Molly, the glasses wearing 1940’s girl, just waiting for her father to come home from fighting in WWII. Damn those awful food rations...

Furby

I know, I know. We can all agree now that Furbies and anything that can somehow listen to you (I’m looking at you, smartphones) are creepy AF. But these things were so dang cool when they came out! Pretty much everyone had one! I didn’t, of course, but they were literally everywhere and all anyone could talk about. You could get a boy or a girl one, they spoke their own language, and you could try to teach them words. It was like having a highly intelligent parrot alien hybrid that you didn’t have to clean up after! I think I got one of the plastic inanimate mini ones that came in a McDonald’s Happy Meal, so I never got to teach an actual Furby dirty words or worry about it waking up in the middle of the night to freak me out and worry that it would murder me Chucky-style. How I miss those would be memories.

Hit Clips

These are perhaps the dumbest things on this listen, but listen, it was 90’s/2000’s, and this was pretty much the first step we had towards mp3 players. Hit Clips were little keychains with a band or singer’s tiny album cover on it, and if you stuck the album in the player, it would play like a 15 or 30 second clip of that band or singer’s certain song. Perfect for when your parents would not buy you that Britney Spear cd because they were freaked out that she showed her midriff all the time and danced around with a snake (as if we were old enough to even figure out what that might even suggest. Parents really thought we were more worldly than we really were as kids. Millennials were the Jon Snow of the 90’s and 2000’s. We knew nothing.)

Every Single Beanie Baby Ever

Remember when we actually thought that Beanie Babies were the equivalent of gold bricks? That if we had enough, kept their tags in the their tag protectors, and kept them dust free in their plastic display boxes, we could sell them and retire? Life was so much more simple then. I had a few Beanie Babies, but like all kids, I wanted more. They were always coming out with new Beanie Babies and I wanted them all. You could never have too many many Beanie Babies and they were the go to birthday and Christmas present for kids for years (remember, they were an investment!). I actually went to an antique store the other day and guess what they were selling: dozens and dozens of Beanie Babies, all dirt cheap! They were even selling still in the packaging McDonald’s Happy Meal mini Beanie Babies! If that didn’t make me feel old and put things in perspective for me, I don’t know what else in this world will.

Pretty Pretty Princess Board Game

Can you believe I’ve never played this game? A friend of mine had it, and once I begged to play it, but she said no, she was bored of it because she had played it too many times. Too many times??? I had never even played it once! How could she be bored of a board game (well, it is in the name) where you get to put on multiple pieces of plastic jewelry and pretend to be a princess?? I remember one time her brother and friends borrowed it to play it as a joke, and I almost joined in, just as a way for me to finally play it. Sad, desperate, and true.

Spice Girls Dolls

Oh geez. This was a big one in my life. As a kid, the Spice Girls ruled the world. They spread girl power, we caught it, felt empowered, and wanted to buy everything that had those five powerful women printed on them (my sister was always kind enough to surprise me occasionally with a piece of Spice Girls gum from a vending machine that came with a sticker in it. I was so proud of those stickers). Their music was epic, their personalities enchanting, platform shoes and Union Jack anythings had never been so cool. And when the Spice Girls movie Spice World hit the screen, it was like the world exploded. (I will go to my grave saying that Spice World is not a terrible movie, it is actually a quirky and genius parody of the Beatles’ movie, A Hard Day’s Night, and is a masterpiece of surrealism. You may quote me.) But back to toys, the one single Spice Girls thing I wanted most in the world: the set of all five Spice Girls dolls. I wanted that set so, so bad. With all of my ever loving Spice Girls heart. I had a friend (yes, another friend who had a toy I always wanted. See a pattern here?) who had TWO sets of the dolls, from her aunt. One for display, and one to play with. TWO sets! And I had none. I learned then that life was unfair. It still is, just not about a set of Spice Girls dolls.

Wettin' Wizzer

This is probably the most obscure one on the list, but do you remember when the live action version of 101 Dalmatians came out, starring Jeff Daniels and the incredible performance of Glenn Close as Cruella De Vil? (I mean, truly iconic!) Well, when this movie came out, I was obsessed. I had 101 Dalmatians everything. Toys, bedspread, sheets, shirts, whatever I could get my hands on. I even wanted a Dalmatian puppy, even though my family’s house was purely cat only. But the one toy I never got and wanted, was a toy called Wettin’ Wizzer. Remember Wizzer from the live action movie? He was the puppy that always seemed to have an accident and they made a toy, where you could feed him water from a bowl, and he would, um, have a little accident. I thought it was the coolest thing ever, but I was never gifted it as a present. So instead, being the genius and annoying child that I was, decided to improvise the lack of Wettin’ Wizzer with one of my many little stuffed Dalmatian toys. I would gather some water in the cup of my hand, pour in on my poor unsuspecting dad’s shoulder and go “uh oh! Wizzer had an accident!” and wave the little Dalmatian around and bounce him on and off my dad’s shoulder. My dad would just roll his eyes and smile, being the good sport he is. If only he knew this could have been avoided if I had had that Wettin’ Wizzer toy. Let’s be fair, I still would have done that to him if I had had the actual toy. It would have been even more delightful.

What was your childhood toy that got away? And what do you think would be the two toys on this list that I'd consider buy on eBay? Because I'd totally buy at least one!

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